Our First Form.. Anything but trivial

So today I waited patiently by the mail box for the postman.. and like clockwork at 11:32am he came riding past and gave me 3 pieces of mail, 1 in particular was our information pack from Children and Family Services outlining more information regarding Adoption and Permanent Care.

It was exciting opening it up to read the goodies inside.. lots of information, and answers to some of the questions we had, also our first form to fill in to register for the training sessions coming up in August..

I know for anyone not going through this journey it might seem trivial, but that is just it... nothing is trivial.. It's our first form of the many dozens we are bound to fill in and supply on this journey and its really exciting for us.

It left us reflecting on the many forms for various things we have filled in previous to this one, our intention to marry, our change of bank accounts, applying for a car loan.. and (with the exception of our marriage form) we looked forward to none of them as much as we do now for each one that will bring us closer to becoming parents.

We keep reading posts of friends and loved ones that are sharing the joyful news that they are expecting a new addition or first addition to their family. And via this blog we feel the same way.. our time until delivering a child into our life maybe drastically different but it is no less important. The heartache we have experienced in previous months has been diminished to a faded shadow in the background. As we look to all that can and will be, my amazing hubby and I feel so much joy and anticipation that it's just to much to hold it in, and also to much to explain.

Any of the following blog updates may seem a little love struck for a child we don't know or have not even met or been accepted for yet, but my hubby and I believe that the love for that Child/Children starts with a hope for them just as it would if we had been blessed to conceive them ourselves.

I hope and pray for anyone beginning to walk this path to parenthood will feel the joy beginning to bubble away inside, removing all pain that once was consuming, with a love that abounds and waits for a new blessing to enter in..

First Phone Call

You never know what to expect when you call different areas or departments..
Well today we made the call to our area's adoption/permanent care centre..
after giving some basic information and answering some questions.. we have come away from it excited at the prospect of starting our family.. so now all the waiting starts.. first just waiting for the information pack and inquiry registration details..

Now I understand that the process can possibly take a long time but I also understand that each case is processed on a case by case basis.. .. matching firstly the child with the right family..

so our exciting time to wait begins..

Whatever the future holds is in God's Hands.. and I have to say I feel more calm and happy over the idea of caring for someone elses child that I do over the prospect of dealing with IVF.. that just assures me more that this is right.. even my hubby has a daddy twinkle in his eyes.. you know the one.. I am so in love with my wife and our kids look... I see it on so many faces well.. he is starting to get that little sparkle going on.. its wonderful

If you have been on the fertility rollercoaster you will understand these feelings.. the ones that weigh you down like a slab of concrete.. no matter how much we pep ourselves up that slab is still there hampering our attempts to be happy and calm and in the good body mode that we are so often told we have to be in... it is stressful trying to not be stressed.. how silly is that..

well for now our slab has gone bye byes so lets see what the future holds.. lets see what it is that we are in for on this new road we are walking..

I have heard a number of others in Australia wondering where do I start.. well the best place to start is with you and your partner or on your own.. looking at your life and thinking could I share it .. its not as simple as get a kid bring it home and everything is hunky dory again there is a serious process you and the child/children have to go through.. and that is there for a reason..

remember it's not all about you.. The agencies in the state you are in are working with one purpose in mind.. to fit a child into the right family.. they wont stick you with just any child its not like placing a fast food order.. you may have in mind the kind of children or baby you would like but there is another side you need to consider.. The Child you are hoping to adopt or take into Permanent care has their own needs, their own dreams, and wants for who they want to be placed with and the truth is that may or may not be you.... so as I was saying this process and consideration starts with you at home... the next step may well be to look at the following information at the state you are in.. for Victoria it is http://www.cyf.vic.gov.au/adoption-permanent-care

this site has a lot of information to look over and consider and also a contact section to get in touch with your local area..

so if you are still thinking about it take a look and see what you think and feel then maybe make your First Phone Call

as for me and the hubby lets see what happens on this Process to Parenthood

The end of one idea gives birth to another

how did we get to this point
I am a 29yr old happily married woman in Australia, before my hubby and I got married 2 and a bit years ago a lot was discussed including the possible inability for us to conceive without medical intervention. For me the possibility of being a mum one day was an always thought..
you know the one I'm talking about the "I always knew I would be a mum" "I always new I would or could or should....." like I said for me being mum is an always thought.. but for my reproductive system is seems to be a "maybe" thought... unfortunately I am one of thousands who have been diagnose with PCOS which is Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, a delightful syndrome the really loves to mess with your head on so many levels.. please refer to the following link so I don't need to bore you http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001408/

so PCOS coupled with a few other medical drama's (ones I won't list) and we have issues..
in our first 6 months we lost two different little angels before the first trimester after that nadda.. :(

with PCOS your cycle can be messed up and all out of sync at the best of times.. try 12 months without a cycle and see how you go.. not fun at all especially when you have the doctor saying try this and it will work, and then it only does one part and not the ovulating, then try this one, but it doesn't work because the first lot still hasn't done the job.. lets just say I have a very uncooperative system..

so now we come to this part.. treatment has not worked and waiting for it to do its own thing is not happening either..

so no we are looking at Adoption...
how did we really go from lets make a baby to this.. well it came as an easy response.. as much as my hubby would love to have his features on another running around the back yard, and as much as i would love to go through the pregnancy (yes even the not so great bits) we have accepted that its possibly just not the right time for our bodies to work together.. and may never happen.
and after a long long conversation We both agreed we could not justify going through IVF....

as I was saying at the start of this Blog, before we were even married we spoke about adopting and or fostering.. with a joint understanding that this is something we would look into doing in 5-10 years.. well turns out we don't want to wait that long.. there is something to be said for raising your own kids, but there is something to be said for sharing the wealth of love you have with a child who can be your own..

so here is where it all begins the grueling and hopefully in time rewarding efforts to go from adoption to parenthood... because that is what we are talking about..

if you are someone who is considering adoption remember to consider this you are not just getting a child you are becoming a parent.. there is no telling what the future may hold but parenthood is for life.. I have already read and heard enough horror stories to know that your head, heart and your life need to be completely committed to this not just your house or your living situation

so as we go down this path to parenthood I hope to share with you what we experience, the joys, the frustrations, and the joys. (oh yes I know I said that already but the end result we hope for is one of joy) you have to have hope.. hold onto it and never lose hope..

the first step for us in an information session.. fingures crossed we come away from it with a much clearer picture of what is ahead for us..